Mars and venus dating uncertainty

Full text of "Mars And Venus On A Date John Gray"

mars and venus dating uncertainty

Mars and Venus on a Date. BY John Gray. During my In stage one of dating, we experience our initial attraction to a potential partner. The challenge in this first. Come back daily for new content, and remember, at Ask Mars Venus, we're always Learn if he's ready to move toward exclusivity, the third stage of dating. Editorial Reviews. Review. The latest tentacle of John Gray's formidable Mars and stages each relationship must pass through: attraction, uncertainty, exclusivity, intimacy, and, finally, engagement (for marriage, of course).

He was out of the country for the 6 months, and got back a few months ago, and now is living at his parents house until he decides what his next move is I guess? He previously lived with an ex-girlfriend and her kids, which he says he "rushed into too fast. HIs parents are apparently out of town for a large portion of the year for various vacations.

He is 37, no kids, no ex wives. He has a history of long term relationships I do not, but he doesn't know this: I let him pursue me via emails on online dating, I told him I wasn't really in a good place because I had just put my dog to sleep the day before I got his message, and he was so sweet and kept offering me his phone number to talk if I wanted a "shoulder to lean on. Especially someone I don't know! At any rate, I got all of the signs that he was very into me.

Lunch With Mars/Venus' John Gray | HuffPost

That was 2 weeks ago our first date. He's paid for everything etc. He is not so great at planning, it seems. I am a planner. On our first date he told me he hadn't been on a date since he had been with his ex-girlfriend, however recently he also told me he met a girl off of online dating that he had screwed around with so I'm confused but I say this because all signs pointed to him being extremely genuine.

He slept over on our 2nd date, no intercourse but 3rd base. He held me all night etc. He called me the same night after he left my house in the am and made plans for that Friday. No specific plans, just that we would have plans. He called me every day.

mars and venus dating uncertainty

He oddly wanted me to come down to where he lives for our 3rd date 20 miles away and when I said "ok sure but I can't drink" and he said "why? He also wanted to go to a happy hour with his friend for our date, and then go do "whatever" afterwards. I guess he wasn't going to tell me he wanted me to meet his friends, but that is certainly what it looked like.

When I explained to him I wasnt' comfortable sleeping at his parents house with his parents there, it took a while but he finally said "I understand why you wouldn't be comfortable. What if we went to a hotel? And he said yes of course. We had the most fun date ever, it was 19 hours long.

When I came to his house, his parents came outside to meet me after he'd asked them not to and it was really cute, awkward, but cute. Somehow I felt ok because he was very much behaving in a way that showed he was seriously interested in me.

Without any typical fast guy moving 'future talk.

Relationship Advice the Way You Need It

Basically, it felt like the 'relationship where you aren't saying you are in a relationship, but you are in one for a little while until you both discuss it" stage. He also drinks, and I am not a huge drinker, so that is a concern of mine.

At any rate - I am so unfamiliar with stage 2 uncertainty and what it feels like for both me personally, and what it feels like coming from a man, that I didn't know if last Saturday that is what started happening.

But your energy levels eventually come back. If you get over stimulated all the time then normal life becomes boring. Hyper stimulation comes in and we enjoy it, but our ability to enjoy normal stimulation decreases.

So we're drawn to more hyper stimulation. An example is when I look at my emails and get good news, then the brain keeps going back looking for more good news. Our brains are constantly being over-stimulated by the world we live in today. Our brains become addicted to that high level of stimulation.

Normal stimulation no longer has a strong appeal. Electronic stimulation produces huge quantities of dopamine. An example is a child who can't listen to his mother but will be completely enthralled if you put him in front of a computer. Familiarity that is positive produces serotonin, which is comfort as opposed to new and exciting.

mars and venus dating uncertainty

We need the sense of certainty and uncertainty in life. This is a reflection of the two major brain chemicals, dopamine, which makes things new and exciting, and serotonin, which give us the support that we need. We become comforted and at ease with serotonin. Here's a link to my website where readers can immediately receive a summary.


I write about how to keep the passion and excitement associated with dopamine alive in relationships as well as the comfort and ease of knowing that person is there. These are the relationship skills I teach. Attraction In the first stage of dating someone we experience an initial attraction.

What we must do during this first stage is make sure that we have the chance to express that attraction to the other and also get to know them. Both partners should put their best foot forward and show an interest in getting to know each other. Uncertainty What happens during this very important and often misunderstood stage is a shift from feeling attraction to doubting that our partner is right for us.

mars and venus dating uncertainty

This uncertainty is normal, and we should not be frightened by it. To become uncertain does not necessarily mean that someone is not right for us. Rather, it is definitely normal to suddenly wonder whether you wish to continue in a relationship with that person.